Homer's Friends The Piedmont Park Gang
The southeast corner of Piedmont Park is just across the street from Homer's condo, and as you can see it is the place for dogs up to no good to hang out. Here are a few shots of the notorious canine criminals who frequent this meeting place of ne'er-do-wells.
Map of Doggie Play Area in Piedmont Park
Bonus: Piedmont Park Picture Gallery, see pictures by date!
Click on Mug Shots to see full-color representations of these fugitives.
Wanted for: Wanton destruction of comic booksRemarks:Duncan's teeth are razor sharp and are considered a deadly weapon by the D.E.A. (Dog Enforcement Association). He is therefore to be considered pawed and extremely dangerous. Last seen in the company of Don Homer, where he was thought to be given a contract for the shredding of a copy of ACTION COMICS #1. (click on mug shot for last available picture of the two comrades in crime).
Wanted for: Suspicion of felony ball theftRemarks: Duffy is thought to be a kleptomaniac with an eye for spherical canine toys (AKA balls, rubber or tennis). An investigation of Duffy's doghouse revealed an underground tunnel filled with over 300 such items, well into the felony range and a source of much mental distress amongst the former owners.
Wanted for: Drug possession and distributionRemarks: Nada's behavior indicates a serious and long-running addiction to cocaine (erythroxylon coca), ecstacy (methylendioxiamphetamine), angel dust/PCP (phencyclidine), and "puppy uppers" (benzedrine, dexedrine). As shown by the file photographs below, Nada is out of control with unimaginable energy and hyperactivity, to the point she even considered a wild attack on Don Homer.
File Photograph #1
File Photograph #2
Wanted for: Public DrunkenessRemarks: Guinness and Harp, fresh from endorsement contracts from the respective breweries which gave them an unlimited supply of beer, have been spotted in Piedmont Park on numerous occaisions lately overcome with alchohol and wobbling from side to side. These two normally ladylike bitches turn, when under the influence, into loud and obnoxious thugs, harassing passers-by and singing sea chanties at high volume. G&H are wanted for an extended period of "drying out" at the Lassie Memorial Recovering Alcholics Canine Treatment Center.
Wanted for: Stick TheftRemarks: In this series of photographs taken by undercover operative Kayla, Graffix is seen grabbing Don Homer's most beloved stick and then ripping it from his grasp. Kayla's report follows:
Operative: Kayla
Undercover Report: As part of a sting operation, I told Graffix I would
be willing to pay up to 10 Milk Bones for Don Homer's Stick. In these two photographs
you can see Graffix giving me the stick and
then licking her lips after eating one of the
Milk Bones. Unfortunately, Graffix escaped and is at large.Last known photograph of Graffix
Darby, Cami, Ginger, and Angus
Wanted for: Numerous Acts of International Terror
Remarks: This group of incredibly evil terrorists is known to intelligence agents around the world as The Four Horsedogs of the Apocalypse. War (Darby) is the weapons specialist. Pestilence (Cami) is well-versed in all means of biological terror, from virus to nerve gas. Famine (Ginger) is the team's explosives expert. Death (Angus) is the team's leader and a master of paw-to-paw combat. If you see any members of this deadly team, contact Interpol immediately.
More information on the terrorist Darby
Wanted for: Running an Organized Crime RingRemarks: Don Homer, AKA Don Incognito, AKA Wigger Woo, AKA Freak Boy, AKA Scooter Brown, AKA Homerhomerhomer, is being sought with extreme prejudice for running an organized canine crime organization out of Piedmont Park. His lieutenants, shown above, are fiercely loyal and will defend Don Homer to the death. Homer is considered large, in charge, and extremely freaky. Do not attempt to apprehend him.
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